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shrinkykitten

"...another reason I'm intrigued with the hanged of Salem, especially the women, is that a number of them aroused suspicion in the first place because they were financially independent, or sharp-tongued, or kept to themselves. In other words, they were killed off for the same sort of life I live right now but with longer skirts and fewer cable channels." Sarah Vowell, The partly cloudy patriot.

7.02.2007

How to make it so that abortion rights are never again threatened....

Make all legislators watch SuperNanny.

Seriously, some people just should not have kids. I can't even begin to discern why the woman on today's episode ever had the first one, much less the second, third and fourth ones. She is horrible, her boyfriend is horrible, the children are going ot be horrible adults unless something changes. It makes me ill.

I know I've blogged about this before - but we really need to change how we think about the role of children in the US - in so many ways - but I would propose first we (as a culture) really change the way we think of people as having more value if they have kids. Not everyone needs kids, not everyone should have kids (or at least not as early as they have them), and not everyone has the wherewithal to parent in a good-enough manner.

I also can't figure out why I keep watching this show. It upsets me, it makes me cry (watching today's mom restrain and hit her kids was just too much). Their attitudes that they are so superior and that they don't need JoJo's help (because obviously the kids are the problems, not them!), make me want to vomit.

One thing I don't like about JoJo is that she doesn't seem to ever talk to the kids when they are acting out - she doesn't try to figure out what might be driving the behaviors. But maybe in most of these cases, the kids are so out of control and the behaviors are so habitual that there are no antecedents - it's just learned behavior.

Oh, she did something new this time - she had them create a "chill-out room" which I think was brilliant. The kids could go in their and draw about their feelings. Superb.

random things:
My mom had to put her kitty to sleep today. She called me right afterwards. Ditzy had been a great member of our family for 15 years. Stinkerbelle turns 13 in a few days. After I got the call, I cried into poor Stinkerbelle's fur and begged her to never get sick.

I haven't heard from dream job yet -and they told me they'd get back to me today. I'm trying to not imagine the worst and imagine that something just came up or, and not that they are just avoiding telling me I didn't get it.

To answer the question about whether I rested on my laurels or sent an email - I did the latter. I figured I had little to lose, and I crafted it so it was funny (I said I wanted to make one last ditch effort to convince them that they wanted to hire me). The person who is making the decision and told me that she really did want to hire me. I hope that hasn't changed.

Edited to add: Just so there is no confusion, I in no way meant that I thought the children on supernanny ought be dead. I had thought that those who read my blog regularly would understand the intent behind the title of this post - but I guess I ought to have explained it more. What I was referring to was that those who are pro-life tend to work very hard to convince women who are pregnant but unsure they want to keep the child that they ought to. More often than not, women who consider abortion know that there are good reasons why they ought not have the child at that time - finances, life issues, health or mental health issues, timing, lack of support, conflicts about motherhood and parenting abilities, a clear sense that one would be unable to parent at that time (or ever). Failing to respect women's own sense of what is right for her, and best for the fetus, is idiotic as clearly - as I think supernanny highlights - not everyone can handle the demands of parenthood. Some may well change and become "good enough" parents with some intervention, and some may not. My parents were forced to have a child (me) before they were ready, and I think the results were fairly disastrous - and I would not wish that on anyone.

7 Comments:

At 9:11 AM, Blogger Seeking Solace said...

"Not everyone needs kids, not everyone should have kids (or at least not as early as they have them), and not everyone has the wherewithal to parent in a good-enough manner."

So true!

 
At 10:01 AM, Blogger BrightStar said...

"I would propose first we (as a culture) really change the way we think of people as having more value if they have kids.

I've been thinking about this issue lately, how it seems like women with kids are more valued than women without, but I wasn't sure where I was getting that from, other than from how I see colleagues / staff interact with me in contrast to my pregnant friend about our personal lives. I have been trying to figure out whether I am being paranoid.

Anyhow, that's about me... sorry...

I am so sorry about your mom's kitty, and I hope Stinkerbelle can live for much longer.

And I hope there is resolution to this particular job uncertainty soon.

 
At 11:50 AM, Blogger Ianqui said...

'kay, I hate to admit this, but I watched that Supernanny too. And I agree, some people are a mess, but I'm always heartened by the fact that Supernanny manages to teach them how to deal. I don't think it's that surprising that some people don't know how to raise kids, but I also don't think it should necessarily have to be built in, and I think it's fine that Supernanny teaches people how to raise their children.

What I get out of watching Supernanny is that it's SO predictable: every episode ends with some family activity where the kids are happy for the first time because the parents are engaging them in play instead of fighting them. Kids want attention, and if you give them POSITIVE attention, they behave better. That's what I've learned from Supernanny.

What's most shocking is that obviously all of these people have watched SN themselves, and yet they can't learn how to apply her lessons until she actually comes to their house. *That's* the scary part. But maybe some watchers have put the show to good use, and so they'll never be the featured family. I can hope.

 
At 9:37 PM, Blogger k8 said...

So sorry about the cat! My 'kitten' died last spring a couple months before she would have turned 19. I know how hard it is.

Supernanny. When it first came on the air, I watched it fairly regularly. It was the car wreck effect, I think. I couldn't believe how stupid some of the parents were - particularly those who refused to act like parents and didn't want to do anything to upset their little darlings. However, the more I've seen of the parents who lose tempers and who resort to violence, the less frequently I find myself watching it. Too painful.

 
At 10:06 AM, Blogger Seeking Solace said...

Good grief! I knew exactly what you were trying to say. And it is sad that you had to clairfy for those who would even think that you would advocate killing of kids!

I am so sorry to hear about your mom's kitty. I knew her kitty is at the Bridge waiting for your mom!

 
At 10:23 AM, Blogger Seeking Solace said...

BTW, I did put a comment in the section defending you. I should have spoke up sooner. Please accept my apology.

 
At 5:24 AM, Blogger Scrivener said...

I agree with you that some people just shouldn't have kids, or shouldn't have kids in the circumstances they are in. But frankly, that just brings me back around to also believing that it makes it more important to have good support structures in place for parents--if we didn't make it so damned hard on parents, they could be better parents, which would mean those kids would grow up to be better prepared to be better parents too, without the need for some cheesy show to give them tips on parenting.

 

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