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shrinkykitten

"...another reason I'm intrigued with the hanged of Salem, especially the women, is that a number of them aroused suspicion in the first place because they were financially independent, or sharp-tongued, or kept to themselves. In other words, they were killed off for the same sort of life I live right now but with longer skirts and fewer cable channels." Sarah Vowell, The partly cloudy patriot.

1.26.2008

Which is worse in a workplace?

Yelling or crying?

I'm curious, what do you think?

6 Comments:

At 12:49 PM, Blogger BrightStar said...

Yelling is awful. It affects the entire tone of the environment, it's loud, other people have to deal with it, anger gets thrust around... hate it.

I pretty much do not have a use for yelling generally, though.

Crying? I really don't find that to be a problem, other than I feel badly that someone is sad. Other than that, it doesn't hurt anything or anyone. I have cried at work, publicly, at my current job, and I would do it again if I was in the mood.

 
At 1:19 PM, Blogger Propter Doc said...

Inappropriate use of yelling is bad, but I've come across circumstances when people needed me to yell at them to give them permission to act in a certain, more positive, way.
Crying at work/in public is humiliating and shameful to me, I hate it when I end up in tears at work, takes me weeks to work past it. The one exception is when the crying is related to work. If it is personal life stuff then I'd sooner people just excused themself or left it at the door.
In either case such strong emotions are not positive things at work. Both create negative feelings and hostility. But they can also tip a situation to the point where it must be resolved and such resolution is usually for the benefit of all.

 
At 1:38 PM, Blogger post-doc said...

I'm terrible at these sorts of questions - I've done both, though my version of "yelling" is actually just speaking angrily, I suppose. I tend to get quieter and my speech becomes clipped and precise when I'm really mad.

I've cried for and with others at work and think my emotional availability has been important to those people in moments of grief or frustration. I can actually think of several instances where I've cried (or excused myself to do so) in my current position and haven't felt badly about it at all.

So I think I'll go with yelling as being worse for me - something I'd feel more awkward about.

 
At 8:07 PM, Anonymous New Kid on the Hallway said...

This is probably really sexist of me, but I'm much more comfortable with yelling than crying. I HATE crying at work. (And have done it, damn it.) Although I will say that my version of yelling is probably just speaking really forcefully rather than shrieking or something.

 
At 4:42 PM, Blogger Clio Bluestocking said...

Depends on the circumstance. For instance, is the yelling: "you dumb idiot! Why can't you do anything right?" Abusive, in other words. Or is it "back off and keep your hands off of me?" Defensive. Or, "Yahoo! I just won the lottery!" Anything abusive is just wrong. Crying would have circumstances as well. (At a particular time in my life, I did a lot of crying in the bathroom -- usually as a result of the yelling of someone else.)

 
At 5:35 PM, Blogger Ookami Snow said...

I think both could be worse than the other one, it all is about how appropriate it is.

Dog dies: OK to cry.
Co-Worker reads all your emails: OK to yell.

Out of skittles in the vending machine: OK to yell and cry.

 

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