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shrinkykitten

"...another reason I'm intrigued with the hanged of Salem, especially the women, is that a number of them aroused suspicion in the first place because they were financially independent, or sharp-tongued, or kept to themselves. In other words, they were killed off for the same sort of life I live right now but with longer skirts and fewer cable channels." Sarah Vowell, The partly cloudy patriot.

1.11.2009

I have to keep active

This is the only way I can keep from just staying in bed all day watching tv (The tudors, Carnivale, etc).

What I know about myself is that I cannot wait for motivation to strike me - I have to get to work and motivation will come along the way as I feel better for accomplishing things and as I find "flow."

For me, motivation is a by-product of work - not an initial step to work.

It's hard though - I expended an awful lot of energy (emotional and psychological) trying to end my job with integrity. I made a commitment to myself that I wanted to behave in a way that would not cause me regrets or guilt. I believe I did that by staying positive, focusing on doing good work, continuing to foster my relationships, and behaving in a prosocial way.

In the end, I got a lot of praise for handling things well, and I felt good about that.

But, just because you behave a certain way, doesn't mean you feel that. I felt hopeless, depressed, worthless, etc. And all of those pushed back feelings hit me at night, on the weekends, and on my first days of unemployment.

Even if the new job works out (still don't know! First day is supposed to be the 16th if so), being let go is hard.

So, I have to keep active. Here's what I have planned this week.

1. Go to museum free days. I'm absolutely broke, so free days are a must. Luckily I have some starbucks gift cards so I can also have tea while I'm out. I don't mind being out in the world doing things when I'm broke - UNLESS I can't afford to get tea (or a drink of some kind) and the NYT. So that will make it better. I also have a 30-day public transit pass, so I can go anywhere and everywhere for "free."

2. Make a little village for my window like this one:



I'm doing this right now.

3. Make frames from felt and pom-poms like these:



and fill them with weird images from Morbid Anatomy

It's a start.

5 Comments:

At 7:37 PM, Blogger BrightStar (B*) said...

I am in favor of self-care. Good for you for doing stuff for yourself.

I gave you an award. Check out my blog. :)

 
At 3:22 PM, Blogger Lucy said...

Those are cool things! I hope you have fun this week. And that the new job starts (and is a good one).

 
At 6:28 PM, Blogger StyleyGeek said...

That village is SO CUTE! Can you post instructions or photos of your work in progress?

 
At 7:20 PM, Blogger shrinkykitten said...

Styley,

I'll try to use the camera in my laptop to take a photo tomorrow. I used Martha Stewart's templates:

http://www.marthastewart.com/portal/site/mslo/menuitem.3a0656639de62ad593598e10d373a0a0/?vgnextoid=7cb06715de2b4110VgnVCM1000003d370a0aRCRD&vgnextfmt=default

http://www.marthastewart.com/portal/site/mslo/menuitem.3a0656639de62ad593598e10d373a0a0/?vgnextoid=2d1f145b523b4110VgnVCM1000003d370a0aRCRD&vgnextfmt=default

as a starting point - I changed some of the patterns significantly. I didn't add all the little dormers and stuff - but I'd like to add a couple chimneys and trees.

 
At 3:03 AM, Blogger StyleyGeek said...

Thanks!

 

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